2-1 up. Nobody saw that coming. Perhaps we never do.

A lifetime of following the fortunes of the England cricket team has been instrumental in forming my world-view, and I’m all-too-aware that – in life, in cricket – pessimism and realism are all-too-often one and the same.

The nature and scale of the defeat at Lord’s was enough to fear the worst, and the changes made to the team didn’t inspire confidence. Sure, Bairstow was in the form of his life, but he hadn’t been facing anything quite like Mitchell Johnson. Was Ian Bell’s worrying form a blip or terminal decline, and how would moving to three help? And Steven Finn – unselectable not so long ago – was something of a risk as a replacement for Mark Wood.

Then Australia won the toss. All over. Whoever wins the toss wins the game.

I’m not sure what was more remarkable about what happened next: England’s display, or the durability of English pessimism. The latter withstood Australia being skittled for 136. It held firm when England ended Day 1 just three runs behind with seven wickets in hand. It felt justified when Johnson bombed out Bairstow and Ben Stokes. Mooen Ali and Stuart Broad put on 87, England led by 145 on first innings, yet pessimism prevailed. At close of play on Day 2, Australia were effectively 23-7, and yet we were still nervous. How many would you be happy to chase? It’s got Trent Bridge 2005 written all over it, and I’m not sure I can stand a repeat of the unbearable tension.

If ever proof were needed that pessimism is at the very core of the kind of Englishness that is associated with the national cricket team. 23-7, for crying out loud.

But if the cap fits…

It’s no baggy green. Australians wouldn’t have fretted if fortunes had been reversed. History has it that Australia expect to win, and England hope to win. But that is to ignore recent history. Sure, very recent history is fairly traumatic – whitewashes tend to be – but a broadening of perspective should inspire confidence among England fans. Australia haven’t won an away Ashes series since 2001. Since Lord’s in 2005, Australia have won just one Test in England – at Headingley in 2009. Ryan Harris has retired. Michael Clarke perhaps should have.

But forget that. Forget 23-7. They are Australia. He is Mitchell Johnson. We are England. In terms of expectations, we are forever stuck in the 1990s.